I read the funniest but very effective illustration today in a book called, "I'll Fly Away" by Garcia Burnham. The cracker was being used to illustrate our hearts. Imagine a person crushing that cracker...you know, like for chili or to use as a topping on a casserole. Anyway, the crushed cracker represents all the trials that the Lord uses us to get us to a place we are "crushed".
So many of us are seeking our true identity and purpose in life. We believe that our identity and purpose our found in pursuing a state of happiness and self esteem. Yet, scripture tells us the starting block to knowing our true identity and purpose are a broken and contrite heart.
Maybe if we pursue brokenness for our sins and sorrow that leads to repentance we will find what we are truly looking for. I don't believe it is in esteeming ourselves. Actually, it's the opposite, at least that is the starting place.
Perhaps we have found ourselves working really hard to the "things" that please God. And just feel like we don't measure up. Maybe the problem isn't, "I just can't do it." Maybe we haven't actually started in the right place. Maybe we need to go back and seek a broken and contrite heart. Realizing we can't do it. Then submitting ourselves to Him. Being willing to obey Him.
Many times when I am this place where I feel like I am just running circles, I can trace my steps back to a place where I said, "no" to God, I won't submit. Then what happens next is I start focusing in all the things I want to do (as good as they may be), it's not what God wants me to do, He wanted me to do something else and I said, "no". To make myself feel better I start pursuing the "godly" things that will improve my life and make me happy.
But I don't begin with a broken and contrite heart. My motives are about what makes me happy and esteems me.
Today, I believe the best prayer I can pray is, "Search me O Lord, know my heart, show me any wicked way in me, lead me into everlasting life."
Having a broken and contrite heart leads to a submitted heart/attitude to the Lord.
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I don't think we like the idea that we are broken, but the reality is....we are broken. If we don't realize this, we don't realize our desperate need for Christ. Something I think it is easy to forget is that we don't just need Christ before we are Christians, but we need Christ every day of our lives. I know I often live my life as though I don't have this desperate need. I am grateful for His faithfulness and grace to continue to remind me that I do!
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